Bright Lights, Big City

With one month to go before the NYC Marathon the celebrunners and rumour spreaders are announcing and speculating – New York, New York, here they come?  These would-be marathoners will join an illustrious and sweaty group of star-studded NYC Marathon finishers, if they make it to the finish line.  And before that, the starting line.

Anthony Edwards:  Status - confirmed.  The ill-fated Goose is trying to run up a cool million for Shoes4Africa, a non profit expanding beyond footwear in a quest to build the largest children’s hospital in Africa.  ER doc does good.   He’ll be running the race with an entourage dressed in bright yellow scrubs.  Odds of crossing the finish line, high.  In 2003 he ran the Chicago Marathon in 3.55.40, so he knows what’s coming.

Edward Norton:  Status - confirmed.  The first rule of Run Club?  Norton, three Maasai Warriors, and a team of 30 are running in support of Maasai Wilderness Conservation Trust.  Odds of crossing the finish line, I have some doubts.  This is his first marathon attempt, his long runs are reportedly peaking at 15 miles, and he often twitters about his various injuries (mostly achilles and shins).  But he does have the world watching, which can be a pretty strong motivator.  And he did some training in Kenya with Maasai Warriors who must have taught him something about finishing.

David Blaine: Status - confirmed.  That’s no trick (illusion Michael, tricks are something whores do for money … that one’s for the Arrested Development fans) - Blaine is running as part of the Norton posse (see above).  Says David, “My compulsion in work and in life has always been to investigate the limits of our capabilities as human beings.  Over and over people demonstrate that we are capable of much more than we think we are, both mentally and physically.  The boundary line of what is ‘possible’ seems to keep expanding.  My attempts to challenge those limits always teach me a lot and I hope they inspire others to find their own hidden reserves”.  He sounds very optimistic about his debut race.  Most folks are optimistic.  Until 32K.  Odds of crossing the finish line, see above.  I’ve read nothing to convince me he’s training for this race.  If his lacklustre fund-raising is any indicator, he’s in trouble.  The power of your mind to overcome your limits can only get you so far.  And by so far I mean 32K.

Alanis Morissette:  Status - rumor.  Started by Edward Norton and spread by me.  Ed tweeted and now I retweet, er reblog: “Alannis Morrissette has just joined our team of runners.  She’s a running machine.”  Except he spelled Alanis with a double n and Morissette with a double r,  so I suspect I will not be running side-by-side with the singer-songwriter.  Fingers crossed for a decent tribute act.  This mysterious double n, double r runner is not even listed in the group bio page of his website.  Stop getting my hopes up Ed Norton!  Odds of crossing the finish line, low.  That said, ex-fiance Ryan Reynolds ran the NYC marathon last year in 3.50.  If we’ve learned anything from her many break-up songs it’s that Alanis is not shy about publically taking down the ex-BFs.  Outrunning him on the streets of NYC is a scheme to rival Unsent.  Except she’s confirmed to run The Bizz Johnston Trail Marathon in California on October 11th, raising funds for the National Eating Disorder Association.  Odds of crossing that finish line, high.  Odds of running another 20 days later, low.

Katie Holmes:  Status - rumor.  Every glimpse of a running Katie fuels mass speculation, fine I start saying, that she’s coming back to run sub-Oprah (at 5.29.58 she needs to shave a long 60 minutes off her time to beat the talk show queen).  Odds of crossing the finish line, low — assuming she doesn’t even line up to start.  If she does start, odd of besting Oprah are 50-50.

Son of Superman:  Status - confirmed.  Matthew Reeve is running under bib 1275, representing the 1.275 million people living with spinal cord disease.  His fundraising efforts are directed to the family philanthropy, The Christopher and Dana Reeve Foundation.  His dream goal is to raise $10,000 per mile.  Odds of crossing the finish line, high.  This is Matthew’s debut marathon, but he has Team Reeve to offer support every mile of the route.  He’s been training since May and he ran the NYC Half Marathon (2.16), a key learning experience for the runner.  With man of steele genetics, how can he not finish?

Tara Costa:  Status - confirmed.  She lost 155 pounds on The Biggest Loser, winning more challenges than any other contestant in the seven-year history and never following below the dreaded yellow line.  But she didn’t win the game.  Odds of crossing the finish line, high.  She’s following the NYRR online training program –indeed she has a blog on the NYRR website– and she has “race” experience.  She ran the Biggest Loser Half Marathon a zillion times around a freakin’ track (2.24.19) and the Biggest Loser Marathon (4.56.24), both with almost no training specific to an endurance event.

Lance Armstrong:  Status - tentative.  According to that rumor rag The New York Times, Lance wants to run with Joan Benoit-Samuelson over the last few miles of the race (i.e. the glory miles).  During Lance’s first NYC marathon running royalty, including Joan, joined him along different sections of the course pacing him to a 2.59.36 finish (in 2007 he ran without escorts and finished in 2.46.43).  Joan visited my run club last week and said she was running for an age group record in New York (the timing is the stuff of movies – 25 years since her Olympic Gold and the NYC Marathon’s 40th Birthday).   Because Joan is running as a competitive age grouper Lance can’t just jump in at the end and pace her to the finish.  Pacesetters need to start the race with the competitors.  The NYRR have extended Lance an entry as a rabbit, but the Race Director expressed doubt that Lance would go for it.  Given that Joan ran 2.49.08 in last year’s Olympic trials it seems doubtful than an untrained Lance can pace her through to the finish.  Sorry Lance, no finish line publicity shots for you.  Odds of crossing the finish line, low.

Did I miss any star-studded 2009 New York City Marathon runners? 

Title Reference:  Jimmy Reed – Bright Lights, Big City.  From the album Jimmy Reed at Carnegie Hall.  1961.  Also the title of a 1988 Michael J. Fox film.  Did I mention I joined Husband on Team Fox?